i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
Randomize
