I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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