so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
