I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
