Old men and throwing up are my life now.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize