I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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