The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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