I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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