Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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