Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
