we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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