found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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