piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
