some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Randomize
