Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
