thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
