wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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