Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Drunk is a universal language darling
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
