Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
