You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
