come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
Randomize
