Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
