All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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