you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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