I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
