There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize
