if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
