I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
birth control should be required to get into college
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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