dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
ugly people sure do ruin things
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
