what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
