Buhtt sex?
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
