If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
