His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
