your thong is hanging out like whoa
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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