Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
