Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
Randomize
