He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Randomize
