Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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