He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
