Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
