We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
