shes about as inviting as chlamydia
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
