summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
