Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
