I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
