You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
