Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
