Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
