It's like God shit irony all over that family
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
Randomize
