I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
it's great music for shaving your balls
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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